confession: i’m writing fiction in bite-size chunks every day in may. for the first time in months, writing is fun again.
confession: last night i had a “wtf?” moment of clarity about myself. WTF have i been doing, choosing, creating, pursuing, and to what end? in the instant flash of sanity, i recognized my compromised integrity, undermined essential nature, and dishonored values resulting from my choices. today i woke up committed to externalized core congruency.
confession: yesterday i had a kiwi memory that made me smile (first time that has happened in 2010). for seven seconds i considered emailing him and sharing the smile-inspiring memory, but then i remembered everything else that transpired between us…and i put him out of my mind.
confession: i bought myself tulips yesterday. i was looking for pale pink ones…fragile soft soft soft soft wispy pink tulips. i went to several places, looking for the right ones. in the end, i didn’t buy pale pink. i almost bought yellow-rimmed happy orange ones because they gaggle-of-chatty-girls giggled from their stamens. finally, after much internal debate, i purchased a big bunch of bright hot pink ones. looking at them now, i realize i’m not as fragile soft soft soft as i thought when i sought pale pink tulips. the truth of me is that i am vibrantly bold like the 30 hot pink ones in two vases on the bar.