confession: papi had to cut me out of a dress this week. no one got hurt.
confession: i wish i were skinnier and leggier and taller, even though others tell me i’m skinny and leggy and tall enough. i wonder when i’ll ever feel like i’m _____ enough. not yet.
confession: from ages 12-29 i wanted bigger tits. at the age of 30 i realized that my tiny perky tits are perfect. as i approach 40, i appreciate my perfectly perky tits even more.
confession: i ordered my new car two months ago. it is presently traveling across the ocean, due to arrive next month. i’m not sure i want it. the new body design has a mean-faced grill. but i ordered it in gold and it gets better gas mileage and it goes 30% faster than my current car. do you know how much faster 30% faster than 165 mph is? i do. i’m good at math. i’m excellent at speed.
confession: if you’ve emailed me and i haven’t emailed you back, i apologize. i apologize further, because i probably won’t email you back until next week. i don’t have an excuse other than i don’t feel like it. i’m not in an emailing mood. i’m moody. as often as possible, i don’t do things i’m not in the mood to do. if you have my private email address, then you are close enough to me to know this about me, and i’m simply reminding you. if you are close enough to have my private email address, i trust that you love, honor, and celebrate this about me. you also know that i celebrate every aspect of you, too.
confession: maker’s mark is better than jameson. woodford reserve is better than both. yes, i know that is heresy during st.paddy’s week…which is why i’m only drinking tequila this week.
confession: if i had more energy i’d do more stuff. a lot more stuff. so would you.
confession: some of the stuff i didn’t have energy to do was dancing every night this week, listening to new bands play at free sxsw shows every afternoon, lunch dates with friends i don’t see often, practicing the piano for an hour each day, and writing the next five vignettes of last weekend’s story.
confession: the most important thing i did this week was talk to my best friend on the phone and book a plane ticket to meet her in nyc next month. yessssssssssssssssssss!