if we assume for a moment that i need you and you need me, and we extend our assumptions to claim that your life matters to me and mine matters to you because we need each other, then for the sake of this assumption, YOUR LIFE MATTERS.
now, we’ll pause our assumptions for a moment, because i bristle at the idea of needing you. not of needing you, specifically, but of needing other people. i’d rather think that i’m a wild loner who can do anything that needs doing by myself because if what i need requires me to need you and i believe you (again, not you, specifically) are unreliable and untrustworthy and likely to lie to me, take advantage of me, or disappoint me, then i feel quite insecure in this precarious situation and conclude that most likely what i need from you i’ll have to go without. but, we’re going to skip right over all that and make new assumptions today.
today we’ll assume that i need you and you need me. because we need each other, because my life intertwines with your life and that makes our lives meaningful to each other, i’m going to be kinder. i’m going to remember to perceive interactions between people as either an act of love or a cry for love, and in either case, the appropriate response to give is love. i’m going to engage in fewer addictive activities because changing those habits will increase my strength, empower my determination, and heighten my awareness of the unease i attempt to assuage with addictive behavior. my increased strength, determination, and awareness benefits you because you need me and i can help you more helpfully when i’m stronger, determined, and aware. i’m going to respect my fear, which means listening for the message underneath. fear has something to tell me. fear stops scaring me when i listen to what it wants me to hear. when i stop being afraid of my own feelings, i’m more capable of engaging with you when you are expressing your feelings and fears. i want to know what you feel and what you fear. i want you to know that i am here for you and with you and i want you to be here for me and with me, too. i’m going to get enough sleep because being tired all the time is tiring, and when i’m tired, i’m sleepwalking through what could otherwise wake me up. i want to wake up to helping you. i want to wake up to accepting the help that you offer me. i want to fasten a lifevest around you before you dive overboard when the ship begins to sink. i want to greet you at every finish line with a bottle of champagne. i want to swim and win alongside you. we’re in this together, needing each other to get farther along, and our lives matter. wake up to what matters. show up and help those around you. they need you. give what you have and give what you are to them.