scariest thing

what is the thing you most want to do that you are most afraid of doing? 

you might have known the answer immediately. 

you might still be pondering the question. 

what is the scariest thing you want? 

i have an appointment to do my scariest thing in less than an hour. i’ve wanted to do this thing for many years, but fear stopped me. like most people, i usually avoid the things i’m afraid of doing, including the things i really want to do. luckily, i’m fearless about most things i want to do. i’ll travel the world alone. i’ll go anywhere alone. aloneness doesn’t frighten me. but i’m afraid of doing this thing in the next hour. i remind myself of things i was afraid to do in the past that i did anyway. i was afraid to confront my abusive father. i was afraid to visit my critical mother. but i did those things with grace enough to honor myself and show up for what i wanted. although, neither of those things scared me as much as the thing i’m doing an hour from now. i pretend that i’m bold as i repeat john wayne’s sentiment, “courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” 

please think about your scariest most wanted thing. are you willing to consider doing it? if you did it, what would you gain? if you did it, what would you lose? i’ve got nothing to lose but fear and i have self-confidence and creativity to gain. already, in the process of making today’s appointment, i’ve planted evidence that i am becoming more of who i want to be and living a new life that embraces more joy, more light, and more spirit. if you did your scary thing, who might you become? if you did your scariest thing, what new life might you begin living?




About angel joy

love is an action verb. i live love in action.
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2 Responses to scariest thing

  1. anisum says:

    I didn’t even have a chance to consciously think, it just came out: being a mother. By far the thing that scares me the most and I want the most.

  2. anisum says:

    And although I’m scared for all the regular reasons (i.e. raising them to be a good person), I’ve also realized in the face of having a child, that death with a child is much scarier than without. The potential of missing out on the child growing up. The potential of my child losing a parent. Shakes me to my bones.

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